How big is your balloon? – Story

I was born twice: first, as a baby girl who grew up to become a daughter, a sister, a friend, a wife and then the second time I was reborn as a mother. I am very proud of my daughter and live all my dreams through her. I wouldn’t believe that one incident could change one’s life leaps and bounds till it happened with my daughter. Yes, sometimes just an “a-ha” moment clicks for you and helps unravel all the beautiful things in store for you. I learnt from my daughter, Amritha that magic always happens outside ones comfort zone. Let me introduce you to my daughter Amritha (I fondly call her Ammu).A cheerful person at heart, she is and always will be the best gift from God. Very creative, a successful SAP functional consultant by profession she was extremely cautious and always under estimated her potential. She always dreamt of starting an innovative venture. As any other normal mother hailing from a South Indian Brahmin family, I wanted my daughter, to get married and have a family of her own. Though she was not against my idea, Amritha had her own reservations.

While the groom searching process was on, with curious neighbours and relatives inquisitive as to why the girl at the age of 25 is still unmarried, Amritha gave me a shock.

She had grabbed her first one year onsite opportunity to Germany. I was totally upset and tried my level best to stop her. ‘See, once you get married, you can even settle in Antarctica’, I pestered her, hoping that she would change her mind. But Amritha always did whatever she liked, my sweet yet stubborn daughter!

Finally the D-day arrived and she boarded the flight and set off to Germany. She worked in Cologne. Though I was extremely proud of her in my heart, still at the end of the day it is this society we live in and I wished for my baby’s secure future. My dutiful daughter “skyped” (Till then I had pronounced Skype as Spike, this was the level of my familiarity with the apps and computers) with me every day and narrated her routine, including her new found favourite chill out spot, Starbucks- where she surfed with her iPad for minimum 2 hours sipping a hot cup of coffee. She was extremely active online. Internet surfing being her hobby and hardly interested in sports, she always had a counter reply to every argument, with anecdotes, examples and stories from facebook.

Being a single parent and bringing her up on my own after her dad’s sudden death in an accident was a life-changing moment for me. I played the roles of a mother, father, teacher, friend, and guide to the best of my ability. I tried to convince, plead, and even blackmail my daughter to come back and look into the prospective grooms, but in vain. She would always tell me – ‘Amma, the society will always have an opinion, irrespective of whatever we do. So just thank them for their unsolicited advice on my behalf and move on! ’

We were travelling like two parallel trains in adjacent tracks, just as the complex algebra problem which always ended in – When will the two trains meet?

I wanted to win and she did not want to lose. After few weeks, my daughter gave in and promised me that she would stay for a year in Germany and then come back to get married, thus satisfying my 51 year old ego.

One day, during our usual conversations she narrated an incident to me. Though I was confused with her question, I reacted in a very different way from my daughter. Before I tell the question, let me first narrate the incident she experienced.

This incident happened during one of her routine trips to Starbucks. She sat in the Starbucks cafe, sipping her coffee and staring out of the window, so preoccupied that she was oblivious of her surroundings. Finally, when she was about to leave she discovered a man staring at her. Perplexed to see a huge German with a round belly my daughter at first wanted to ignore his stare and leave the Café, but later decided to inform the waitress. By this time, the well-built man smiled at my daughter with a courteous ‘Hello’.

In India, we generally never wish or greet anyone on the road or at a Café even if we happen to see our “acquaintance”, let alone strangers. As it was the first experience for my daughter, she stared at him with a stern look on her face.

He again tried to casually strike a conversation with her sipping his Vanilla latte. Unable to avoid him, as well as the curiosity that comes with her age, my daughter mustered some courage and softly quipped – ‘Hello’. The man in-a-matter-of-fact manner enquired– ‘Indian? Namaste!’ My daughter was surprised at the response, though she wanted to run away from the scene.

As though reading her mind, the man declared in quick succession in an assertive tone– ‘Hey, don’t worry, young lady. I am Herr. Frank Schneider, a chef by profession. Have a nice day! ’

Though momentarily confounded, Amritha regained her composure. The chivalrous chef replied – ‘Madam! By the time I picked up my Vanilla latte from the counter, you had taken my seat and were engrossed with your iPad. I was just quietly waiting and enjoying my drink as I did not intend to disturb you. Now that we are actually having a conversation, I would like to know your name’.

‘Oh, I am sorry for the misunderstanding. I am Amritha, software professional’ replied Amritha curtly.

Gradually as the conversation with the Chef grew, my daughter was astonished to know that the Chef had travelled different parts of the world to learn the exquisite cuisines around the world and could speak 15 languages fluently including Tamil and Hindi, while she still knew only to say Good morning in German. He also narrated how he simply walked out of his job while preparing an innovative dish, when his boss retorted – ‘Stick to the usual menu. I do not want any change here’.

Amritha was puzzled and asked ‘W-H-A-T? It would have easier for you to repeat the same dish than trying a new one’

The Chef smiled and said – ‘Oh yes –but it is against my beliefs. I believe that change is the only constant thing in life. I love to experiment, make mistakes, and try new things.’ The Chef also took a slight dig at her saying – Do you know our entire planet spends more than billion hours in a week in the internet? The root cause for all the problems begins with killing time alone.

‘But who asked you to engage in such a long conversation with a stranger Amritha?’ – I interrupted her story.

‘Just chill and let me complete my story mom! Only if you listen further, you can answer my question.’

‘Ok-Continue’, I told her disinterestedly, inwardly eager to know what happened but did not want to encourage my daughter talking to strangers.

‘Then…all of a sudden, the Chef took some balloons out of his pocket and asked me to blow them.’

‘Haha-but you do not know to blow balloons.’ – I burst into a chuckle.

‘….and why didn’t you teach me my mother ’- she winced at me accusingly. ‘Still I managed to tell him that I don’t waste my energy blowing balloons. I would rather do it with a hand pump. But that Chef did not show any reaction ma, and he replied – ‘Fine, young lady. Blow it to a size you think is big enough.’ I left the place making an excuse. But he reminded me about the balloon, wanted me to blow it up and meet him tomorrow!

So tell me mom, Shall I go and meet him tomorrow. It’s not a big deal. I just need to blow a balloon and meet him at Starbucks. It would be pretty safe.

I immediately became protective about my daughter and told her not to visit the Café for about three months. I scolded her again for engaging into such a long conversation with a stranger. I advised her to throw away the balloon immediately into the bin and forget the incident forever.

What she narrated to me the following night left me astonished. I learnt that, ignoring my long lecture sessions; Amritha did visit Starbucks again with that balloon blown up to a medium size! Though she apologized to me, a realization dawned upon me. I was not sure whether to feel proud that my little one is still keeping me informed about her decisions or insecure that she did not pay heed to my advice. Nevertheless, I wanted her to share the story with me and allowed her to proceed without much argument.

Amritha continued – ‘You know ma, Mr. Schneider was already waiting for me with an “I-know-you-would come” grin on his face. His cheeks had turned red in excitement. He had arranged balloons blown in different sizes on his side of the table. Unable to gage his intentions, I too smiled warmly at him, placed my balloon on the table and looked at him questioningly. With his clear loud baritone he called a little kid roaming in the Café curious to know about the place while his parents were enjoying a family time. He asked the child to take any balloon of his choice. The child immediately took the biggest balloon without hesitation and jumped with joy.

‘Do you see the difference?’- He asked me.

‘Oh Amritha- just come to the point. I appreciate your melodramatic story telling skills but I hope you are fine and that is all I am now worried about ‘I exclaimed impatiently. The anxiety of a 25 year old mother of an unmarried daughter who is all by herself in a foreign land was driving me crazy.

‘Fine then listen to the end – I am perfectly safe and I have accepted a challenge from the chef. Happy now?’ she irritatingly responded.

‘What? Oh Lord! Please show the right path to my daughter. Now tell me in detail. What is this challenge about? Don’t act smart, we have also crossed your age’

‘Then listen to me without interruptions’, ordered Amritha as she continued to narrate – ‘With those balloons of different sizes, the chef wanted to show me the different circles in life. The smallest being an individual- then one’s family –followed by the society , then ones country, succeeded by the continent and ending in the Galaxy’. He compared my balloon to one of his and the size was corresponding to that of a country. ‘Young lady’, he told me ‘you have to explore the new continent, travel and interact with people, learn new things, get out of your comfort zone and keep yourself busy. As we grow up we tend to shrink our thoughts, set certain rules in our mind and hesitate to come forward and fail to see things in a fresh way. All this is because we prefer to do things in the same old manner!’

I was bowled over by the statement. I remarked that it is difficult to practice whatever he has preached now. This provoked him to challenge me. He said – ‘Are you game? Would you like to meet me after 6 months? We will narrate the new things we have done after 6 months.’ This is the challenge I have accepted.

After learning the developments I encouraged Ammu to accept the challenge as I was happy that she would not meet that Chef, at least for 6 months now after which she would be back to India soon.

Six months passed by. Amritha had done many more things than she had imagined. She had learnt the German language, learnt swimming with the new friends she made in her German class and had travelled to France, Italy, Greece, Czech Republic and Spain. She was too eager to meet the Chef as she wanted his help and support for her next plans.

When she met the Chef, this time in one of his Burger truck outlet, she learned that he had gone on a road trip and successfully started his own “Healthy Burger truck”. He had made a perfect amalgam of his passion – travelling, with his profession – cooking and had enjoyed the six months blissfully. He had fastidiously prepared a tasty salad with julienned cucumber and cherry tomatoes for Amritha. They had become really good friends now and had started addressing using first names. Amritha shared her memoirs with Frank. ‘These six months have been the most memorable days of my life. I am planning to start a website, wherein people with similar hobbies can meet and pursue it together. I am not sure how far this would work; I hope it is made use of by genuine people. ’That’s amazing Amritha – a nice way to make people interact with each other through internet. Hey you can include my name for cooking. I would love to share my recipes and guide amateur cooks’

‘Aha, that’s a cool idea! I think recruiting experts from every field would make my website more credible!’

Slowly, my daughter’s website ‘www.whatsurhobby.com’ grew to over 250,000 page likes and 8000 members in less than two years. She managed to live her dream and in turn realize my dream.

Learning is a continuous process and there is no bar on learner’s age. Ammu’s trip to Germany has been a learning experience for me too. Now I can handle a smart phone with ease and even click my own selfies to share it with my daughter.

The more we blow the god-gifted balloon in our hands – Our life, the wider our thoughts grow. The stronger we believe in our thoughts, the sooner it would unfold into reality.